i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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