You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
