The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
worst night to have a conscience
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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