So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
