Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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