Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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