he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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