I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Randomize
