does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Randomize
