Whoa Z and x make the same sound
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
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