I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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