No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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