don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
