I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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