i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
BRING THE BAGELS
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I would fuck him just for his dog
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
