he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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