creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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