Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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