id be glad to
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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