This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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