it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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