So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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