listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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