I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
i think i just lost a toe
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
