i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Is Oprah even human
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
