worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
