Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Randomize
