so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
