is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
