on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
