i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
