hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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