we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Randomize
