have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
