Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
