if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
you made out with another girl for some wings
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Randomize
