The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Randomize