spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
