8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Randomize
