its not stalking. its research.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
