I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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