pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
