he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
