haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
