And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
