The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Randomize
