His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize
