it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
