you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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