Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
